The results were bad. Truly bad--and the even harder part is that we were prepared for the problem to be with me. Such a "standard" when thinking about why you aren't able to get pregnant--the woman automatically thinks: "something is wrong with me!"
So as we absorbed what the doctors were telling us, we were both wondering how we were going to navigate this path that had been laid out for us? I was having a hard time finding books/websites/blogs that had any more than a blip about male factor infertility.
Thankfully, I connected with the ALI community and it became a place where I learned, shared and received support. But as I've mentioned before, Mook was dealing with the diagnosis in more private manner and felt isolated as far as sharing his feelings and connecting with other men experiencing a similar diagnosis.
I only wish we could have had a book like Swimming in Circles by Michael Barr for Mook and I to read together during those really dark days. However, it has proved to give us some "back-dated" healing after absorbing Michael's thoughts and reading about the experiences he and his wife went through.
Thanks to the wonders of social media, Michael and I have become blog and twitter pals in recent months, so it's meant a lot for us to be able to have this connection.
Here is a quick blurb from Michael during one of our discussions:
"...if you think infertility is a taboo subject to begin with, just imagine being a guy. That's quite honestly why I wrote the book - almost all the books and all the (good) blogs are from females, and while it's not impossible to interact, I think guys often feel like the impostor - so we often lurk, but rarely share. I just about went nuts going through all the in vitro because I literally had nobody to talk to about it - and the book became the outlet. What comes out quite literally looks like a love story with all the ridiculousness of our lives and infertility mixed in. I'm not sure that's going to get guys out of their man-rooms and into the discussion, but at the very least, maybe the story will resonate with them a little and they won't feel so alone. If that happens, I've done my job."
Michael has also offered to hold a Q & A session here for anyone who has questions about male factor infertility, his book or other question about his journey--just ask in the comment section!
And now onto the giveaway!
To enter to win a signed copy of Michael's book: ways to enter!
1) Leave a comment below discussing your thoughts on male factor infertility. For example: is it talked about enough or not? Do you think men suffer just as much as women in the IF journey?
2) "Like" Michael's Facebook Page for Swimming in Circles (leave comment stating you did so)
3) Tweet this post (leave a comment stating you did so)
You can enter the book giveaway from May 24, 2011 - May 31, 2011 and a winner will be chosen by a random generator. Please leave an e-mail where you can be contacted!
