One of my
The short version?
Its not great news but not terrible news.
Can you see where I might get lost in thought when faced with being in that limbo space? Uh huh.
And truthfully, I still don't have the full story to tell since another piece of the puzzle will be answered with an appointment tomorrow.
But first you must know about the wonderful company I had last Tuesday. Don't tell Mook, but I woke up next to another man on the morning of my appointment:
|Meet my Pocket-Ninja, Mojo|
So Mojo was ready to rise and shine and get me moving the morning of my appointment. Too bad he wasn't tall enough to make the bed...
|Breakfast of champions for a girl with a nervous stomach. Water & saltines|
|Sitting with me in the waiting room, propped by O-mans sippy cup. We all need some form of support.|
|Death grip on Mojo as my name was called...|
|Mojo volunteering to go through the procedure for me.|
With a portion of my inguin.al lymph nodes getting a good laser zap and more skin/tissue left in a petri dish, I left the office with a hug from my doctor and a reassuring smile. So glad shes been fantastic with all of this.
And with the post-appointment news that she still did not reach clean cells, I will definitely have one more photo-therapy treatment next week, and more decisions will be made from there. I will also have my thyroid dye test and nodule biopsy tomorrow. If that comes back with anything more than my hormones being completely out of whack, I will move to the big guns: a PET scan.
People (who are these "people" anyway?) say that living in a state of denial isnt healthy. Its not that I feel that Im in complete denial, I guess its still surreal. What can you do but take it one day at a time, and hope that your body is working to defend itself. I go from extreme sadness to extreme anger, determined to use both emotions to keep on swimming.
Hey, nothing in my book is harder and more painful than the road I took on the IF journey. Not that this is a walk in the park, but I'll do what I've been doing for a looooong time: HOPE.