Monday, April 30, 2007

hope: a dangerous 4-letter-word

Lovely title, I know. But:
  • How can I hold back that elusive "four letter word" when I am on CD 28, and there is no sign of AF dropping off her bags?
  • How can I not let the dangerous HOPE creep in my thoughts when for the past 5 cycles, dear AF has showed up by now?
  • How can I keep myself from P.OA.S when I don't want to give up on HOPE when I look down to see one line instead of 2?
  • How easily I can envision myself calling our RE and saying: "Thanks, but I don't need ya!"
  • How I feel no "typical" signs, but by now my boobs are getting the old poke and prod every 2 minutes to see if they really hurt more than usual.
  • How I want to HOPE that by throwing this past cycle to the wind, that nature really did take its course?
I guess through all of the things we have already been through, and all of the things that we are preparing to go through, that HOPE will never let us go--we just have to be willing to hold onto HOPE........


24 comments:

  1. Hope can be so hard. It's worth it though because hope is often the thing that keeps us going. It would be wonderful if you had some happy news for us soon...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hope is a doosey during these times. I hope and hope some more that this is a good sign.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have no good advice on that one. I'm always hoping!

    You always find such great pictures for your blog!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hold on to your hope. You never know when things are going to turn your way. Keep us posted!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hope is so scary. I haven't been holding mine very well. I hope that passing it on to others will help it only grow!

    ReplyDelete
  6. SO hoping for you!! Sending you the best!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. We're all addicted to hope. Keep on hoping.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I've been doing the boob prodding thing this week. I was really late after my first IVF cycle and am heading into really late this month.

    I'm an old friend of Hope, but she's kind of scary. Once you're all cosy with her you've feel a whole lot worse when she jumps ship. BUT without hope we'd walk around weeping.

    Keep on hoping and my fingers are crossed for you xx

    ReplyDelete
  9. Nothing wrong with a little hope; I hope it's a sign of a little something else, too!!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. i am hoping for you too, best of luck!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Jump into the hope boat with me - lets hope it floats. Fingers crossed for you x

    ReplyDelete
  12. I love this post! It really is something dangerous and something that keeps us going. I know I couldn't live without it!

    ReplyDelete
  13. While "hope" can be the worst 4-letter word around, it's also what gets us through from cycle to cycle. Without it, we'd all stop after one...or six. We'd never do treatments if it weren't for the hope that it would work.

    Just hang on to the hope...with a little salt. :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Well, you do have a very good reason to HOPE don't you?? And here I am, also HOPING wildly for you... please keep us updated!!! x

    ReplyDelete
  15. It is a scary time, and even good things like hope can seem dangerous. Well, I am hoping like hell for you!
    Hang in there!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I am hoping with you too, I know how dangerous it can be! (hugs)

    ReplyDelete
  17. Matthew M. F. Miller says:

    A lot of people say everything happens for a reason, which I think is a lame way of avoiding thoughtful evaluation.

    You are a smart woman, and you've taken the time to examine your predicament. The mere fact you've acknowledged feeling leery of false hope shows that you've extracted reason from everything that's happened, and not vice versa.

    I am hopeful on your behalf, and so is everyone else here.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'm still hoping for you guys. Hope that the reason you haven't updated is because you're celebrating. Thinking about you guys tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ah yes hope really is a dangerous word.

    ReplyDelete

There is nothing like a good pair of jeans; they shape us, support us and make us look our best. I'd love for you to share your jeans with me!