Monday, October 1, 2007

"JJ runs down the field as an open receiver..."

Well, as you can clearly see by my little ticker on the right, I did not reach my happiness challenge goal, but it was a good effort--and I will continue to work my way to goal even though it's October-wow, it's already October?!

My goal was to walk every morning--and although I love the good feeling of walking and the results I began to see--some mornings were just hard. Sleep can do funny things to the mind--especially if you are going to bed at midnight and then setting your alarm for 6:30am. The walks that I did take allowed for some "me" time, and that I am grateful for. Some days brought tough reminders, but even those helped me to be honest with myself about the pain I felt from our failed ivf cycle, and about the hope I have for what lies ahead....

So I will plow ahead--and be realistic--it might not happen every morning, but I'll remember how good it feels when I do wrestle my internal sleep-o-meter to get up and GO!

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Our weekend was pretty good-we went tailgating with my in-laws, got to see our Alma mater play a great football game, kept our windows open ALL day (mmm fall temperatures), did the "fall cleaning" in the yard and inside. It was great being able to be outside in such great weather--we do need rain badly, so I will welcome some gray days, but I'll take advantage of the sun while I can!

Being at the football game this weekend, I ended up having to take some game-terminology literally. And I had to put my pride/feelings in check for 2 reasons: helping a fan of the opposing team, and this fan was pregnant.

Yeah, two biggies in a span of 15 minutes.

I'll back up a bit: there was no shade on either side of the stadium, so well into the 3rd quarter I was beginning to feel like a sardine---the game being sold out, we were all packed into the bleachers quite intimately. I needed some personal space and some shade! I decided to walk off towards the back of the stadium where I wasn't subjected to small kids running around and lawn-blankets full of babies/families.

But fate had a bigger plan for me than running into the occasional adorable two-year-old...as I was rounding towards the restroom area, I felt a hand grasp my arm--a bit startled, I turned to see a woman I didn't know, doubling over as she grasped tighter on my arm. OK, my first thought is: great, I've got a drunk, annoying fan from the opposing team about to puke on my shoes. Fantastic.

Umm, not so much. Yes, she was about to puke. Yes, she was from the opposing team, but she was not drunk--probably hasn't had a drink in about 4 months. A sweet face looks up at me, hands me her cell phone and croaks "Please just hit send-tell my husband Dave to come get me at the ladies room. I'm pregnant, and I feel very sick." I do just as I'm told-and unfortunately Dave is on the other side of the stadium. So I lead her over to the shade, and help her sit--I get her a bottle of water and she goes right back to grasping my arm. We don't talk much-just the occasional, "are you feeling better?" Dave finally arrives--he thanks me, she gives me half smile--and then I back away. He has already alerted the EMS on hand to come assist her--they quickly get her on a stretcher, and then they are gone...

I just stayed in the same place for a while--not really knowing what to do. I kept looking at the spot where she sat. Wondering if she would be OK. Wondering if her baby will be OK. She wasn't too far along, I'm guessing--but you could tell she was pregnant. I felt so many feelings in that span of 15 minutes, its overwhelming to think about. And I hate to admit that jealousy was still one of those feelings. I know at one point I even looked down at her wrist to see if she might be wearing a pomegranate bracelet...

I hope and pray she is OK...and that the baby was fine. I know someone else would have done the same thing if she had grasped their arm, but I was meant to be the open receiver that day...


34 comments:

  1. You are a far better person than I am. In my current bitter state, I probably would have watched her crumple to the ground and then would have hissed, "Fend for yourself, you damned Breeder."

    Okay, obviously I would NOT have really done that, but it's what would have been going through my head a la Ally McBeal.

    I keep forgetting to email, but PLEASE PLEASE send me your full CD. I am wearing out the grooves on my Phoenix Mix playing your songs over and over. I am still in awe that I actually know someone with a voice this beautiful...

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  2. You have a heart of gold.... You did the right thing - at least, the kind, unselfish, and Good Samaritan thing. I know it's not about deserves, but people like you deserve that belly. I hope you get it too. Until then, keep sharing such stories b/c they give us a glimpse at who you are & it's amazing.

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  3. I think you absolutely did the right thing. Karma better treat you accordingly!

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  4. Bless you for being there for a stranger.

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  5. Wow, what a strange situation to be in. You are such a sweet person for coming to her rescue. Especially when you have to battle your jealousy and keep your other emotions in check to do so. What a do gooder!

    Kudos to you for your happiness challenge! I wish I was as successful as you were :)

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  6. You are amazing. I can only hope that I would be brave enough to do the same thing in that situation.

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  7. Way to take one for the team JJ!!

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  8. You did a great thing in helping her out. It's crazy that YOU happened to be the one she grabbed! Wow. I loved that you looked for a bracelet. I need to remember to start looking for them on others.

    Ok, everyone is talking about your CD. Where can I score one? :)

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  9. glad to hear that your weekend was generally good. your work as the open receiver is honourable, yet not surprising in the least. you seem like quite the compassionate soul, miss. i'm glad you were there for her, but know that it must have been difficult.

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  10. I am not sure that anyone one could have caught the pass better.

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  11. JJ I know it must been so hard, but knowing you as I do now, I am pretty sure that you would never do any different.
    THANK YOU SO MUCH for the lovely cd, girl you can sing!!!!
    you are on my prayers

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  12. Wow, what a surreal experience. I always wonder about strange encounters like this. Of ALL the people at that game, why did it end up being your arm she grabbed? I'm sure it must have felt good to have helped her...and I agree with somewhat ordinary that karma better treat you accordingly! Glad you got to enjoy a good game and some lovely fall days - I love this time of year!

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  13. It really says a lot about you that you were able and willing to do that. You definitely did the right thing as I think any one in that position (feeling sick & needing help--pregnant or not) would have been so appreciative that you were there. You are a sweetheart. And I know it must have been hard for you, but you did what had to be done and I'm sure that she appreciated it more than you'll ever know. :)

    I want a CD too! I love female singers and I'm in desperate need of some new music! :)

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  14. Like everyone else here, I'm impressed and not surprised that you went the extra mile to help. I'm becoming more and more a believer in Karma. Your turn is sure to come to be on the receiving end of some goodness.

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  15. Wow, what an incredibly story. It gave me chills to think of you selflessly helping a pregnant woman whose shoes you'd so desperately like to walk in. You are clearly a wonderful person and I agree with the others that your turn better be coming soon.

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  16. What a great thing that you did to help that woman. If only she knew how awkward that situation was for someone not in a the 'pregnant state'.

    Your future child(ren) will be so lucky to benefit from your great nurturing skills...

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  17. Awww, that was a very nice thing you did.

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  18. Good for you! I bet she's thinking fondly of the nice lady who helped her :)

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  19. Yeah to your walking. I am trying really hard to do the same. My alarm goes off at 5:15. Of course I snooze it for 5 more min. Then I play on the computer. Then finally I am out the door. I wish I would just get up and go and forget the snooze and computer. I wouldn't feel so stressed in the mornings. Well look what I am doing now, ON THE COMPUTER! STUPID ME!

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  20. I received the mix CD. Your awesome! You put alot of thought and time into this CD. You have such a beautiful voice! I had no idea you sang! You need to send me more stuff with just you! Your so talented! I have allready listened to this whole CD twice this morning. Lol!

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  21. You get the MVP award and the game ball for that one!

    I got the CD! Beautiful! Love track #3!!!!!
    Thank you.

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  22. What an intense moment - what else could you have done? Wow. You definitely earned some good karma there.

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  23. Great post- great analogies. You did the right thing. Maybe what goes around comes around and you will get good news soon. :)

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  24. Wow...what an interesting day, huh? It always feels amazing to help someone in need. And yes, karma WILL repay you for being so awesome!

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  25. Out of all the people in that massive stadium ..... how does it end up being someone (gracefully) handling IF, helping out the pregnant lady??? Man, I would have found that hard. Life is strange.

    Good for you, JJ. xox

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  26. Bravo!
    JJ saves the day.
    Nice work, my dear.

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  27. JJ - you are the sweetest soul. That is some major good karma you have going, I am sure. I like that you looked for the bracelet.

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  28. You are a good person. And I bet you become part of the mythology of this child's life. Which is sort of a crazy idea of how a person can crash into someone else's life and make this huge difference.

    And I hope whoever is keeping track of karma makes note of that before your next cycle...

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  29. Whoa. That's crazy. I probably would have sat down where she was sitting and cried my head off until the EMS team (or men in white jackets) came to take me away.

    Way to go JJ. Good Karma.

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  30. man, that was nice of you. i am sorry that you had to go thru that.
    i am always misreading things because of infertility. for instance, i always see the word "pressed" as pre-seed. silly, eh? i wonder if we always will?

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  31. I am so sorry you had to encounter that...but what a great person you are.

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  32. Wow. That's a wild story. You are a good soul and it's good that you were there (despite the irony of it all) because someone else might not have been so gracious.

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  33. This post brought tears to my eyes. More than you wanting to know what happened, I wanted her to know what it must have taken that random stranger to help her. You are a saint.

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  34. Rest assured, you were an angel to someone that needed you. Just like you're an angel to all of us at the Braces Bunch. Here is a big, warm hug to try and comfort you. :)

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