"JJ runs down the field as an open receiver..."

Well, as you can clearly see by my little ticker on the right, I did not reach my happiness challenge goal, but it was a good effort--and I will continue to work my way to goal even though it's October-wow, it's already October?!

My goal was to walk every morning--and although I love the good feeling of walking and the results I began to see--some mornings were just hard. Sleep can do funny things to the mind--especially if you are going to bed at midnight and then setting your alarm for 6:30am. The walks that I did take allowed for some "me" time, and that I am grateful for. Some days brought tough reminders, but even those helped me to be honest with myself about the pain I felt from our failed ivf cycle, and about the hope I have for what lies ahead....

So I will plow ahead--and be realistic--it might not happen every morning, but I'll remember how good it feels when I do wrestle my internal sleep-o-meter to get up and GO!

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Our weekend was pretty good-we went tailgating with my in-laws, got to see our Alma mater play a great football game, kept our windows open ALL day (mmm fall temperatures), did the "fall cleaning" in the yard and inside. It was great being able to be outside in such great weather--we do need rain badly, so I will welcome some gray days, but I'll take advantage of the sun while I can!

Being at the football game this weekend, I ended up having to take some game-terminology literally. And I had to put my pride/feelings in check for 2 reasons: helping a fan of the opposing team, and this fan was pregnant.

Yeah, two biggies in a span of 15 minutes.

I'll back up a bit: there was no shade on either side of the stadium, so well into the 3rd quarter I was beginning to feel like a sardine---the game being sold out, we were all packed into the bleachers quite intimately. I needed some personal space and some shade! I decided to walk off towards the back of the stadium where I wasn't subjected to small kids running around and lawn-blankets full of babies/families.

But fate had a bigger plan for me than running into the occasional adorable two-year-old...as I was rounding towards the restroom area, I felt a hand grasp my arm--a bit startled, I turned to see a woman I didn't know, doubling over as she grasped tighter on my arm. OK, my first thought is: great, I've got a drunk, annoying fan from the opposing team about to puke on my shoes. Fantastic.

Umm, not so much. Yes, she was about to puke. Yes, she was from the opposing team, but she was not drunk--probably hasn't had a drink in about 4 months. A sweet face looks up at me, hands me her cell phone and croaks "Please just hit send-tell my husband Dave to come get me at the ladies room. I'm pregnant, and I feel very sick." I do just as I'm told-and unfortunately Dave is on the other side of the stadium. So I lead her over to the shade, and help her sit--I get her a bottle of water and she goes right back to grasping my arm. We don't talk much-just the occasional, "are you feeling better?" Dave finally arrives--he thanks me, she gives me half smile--and then I back away. He has already alerted the EMS on hand to come assist her--they quickly get her on a stretcher, and then they are gone...

I just stayed in the same place for a while--not really knowing what to do. I kept looking at the spot where she sat. Wondering if she would be OK. Wondering if her baby will be OK. She wasn't too far along, I'm guessing--but you could tell she was pregnant. I felt so many feelings in that span of 15 minutes, its overwhelming to think about. And I hate to admit that jealousy was still one of those feelings. I know at one point I even looked down at her wrist to see if she might be wearing a pomegranate bracelet...

I hope and pray she is OK...and that the baby was fine. I know someone else would have done the same thing if she had grasped their arm, but I was meant to be the open receiver that day...