Thursday, April 17, 2008

Happy Braces Bunch Day!


This time last year I was feeling a bit like an outsider in the infertility community due to our male-factor diagnosis. I needed to write a post explaining that I greatly appreciated the support I was finding through other blog-buddies, and felt the need to explain why I felt a bit disconnected.

The best way for me to express these feelings was to compare it to the time where all my friends were getting braces. Thank goodness I never had to have braces, but being a young pre-teen girl, I wanted to do what all my other friends were doing.

After one of my close friends complained after having her rubber bands tightened, I blurted out that I was jealous that she got have braces in the first place: “You always come back with the coolest color rubber bands, and it makes your smile so pretty!” I’ll never forget the look on her face of complete shock, and then her answer: “Why would you ever want this pain?”

Why would I want that pain? I felt that experiencing what my friends were experiencing would create a bond between us. But looking back, I know there were plenty of things to bond us—crushes on boys, clothes, music, school. I didn’t need to be exactly like them to gain their support and friendship.

I realized that although we may not be dealing with female factor issues that so many of my blog-buddies are facing, that I would still gain support and bond with many fabulous women (and men!)

So the Braces Bunch was created. (the original post can be read here)
The Bunch started with around 12 members, and has grown to 35 incredible women. We have exchanged supportive notes, letters, birthday cards, a Secret Santa! We have cheered successes, and sympathized with hard times. I have loved opening my mail box to see a card from one of these women—it’s so much better than getting a bill! Thank you to each buncher for the support and bond I have created with you!

Today I would like to offer an invitation to join the 2nd generation of the Braces Bunch! You can read that original post, or email me for details. If you love snail-mail and creating stronger relationships with those going through similar situations as you, this is the place for you!

Some of the 1st generation women are going to be busy (or already are!) with wee-one’s to look after, so they have graduated from the bunch. Just to reiterate, there is no cut-off or requirements to be in the Bunch. You can be in treatment, waiting for treatment, pregnant, or a parent after IF.

Wontcha be a buncher?

29 comments:

  1. OMG!! I've been feeling sad for months because I felt left out from the Braces Bunch - like it was some sacred inner circle of cool IF chicks. :) Even more so, cause you were MFers like me (no, the other kind). :)

    Will send in my address tout suite to get in on the bunch!

    ReplyDelete
  2. So, I also never had to have braces and was so very jealous of my friends who had them. As you know, male factor is also our problem. Lack of braces, lack of sperm..we have so much in common, lol.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You know, I LOVE the support I get but there is nothing like reading a post about male-factor. It takes me to a place where I feel I can 100% relate but this is a whole post in of itself! I'm so glad I found you! I would love to be a 2nd Generation!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Me me me!!! I want to be in!!!
    I always needed braces as a kid, but we were too poor so I was miserably on the outside of the braces bunch then, and beyond reluctantly so.
    It's ok, I was able to afford Invisalign myself in my mid-twenties, but I never forgot the feeling.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Happy Braces Bunch Day JJ - it's been great being a member for the last 12 months...here's to many more years!

    Thanks so much for arranging, you're a star.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I agree, it is so hard to find others with MFI. I would love to join, even though Hubby and I are (hopefully) on our way to parenting now (God willing).

    ReplyDelete
  7. I would love to join! I love mail and I love all of you!

    I will confess that I used a straightened paper clip as braces before I got them for real.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I totally missed the 1st round too... Always have regretted it. :( Not sure if I still qualify, since I'm now "on the other side". :(

    ReplyDelete
  9. Happy 1 year Anniversary, JJ!!

    Thanks for bringing us all together! I found your original BB post when I was just starting down the road of IVF after 2 years of working out the infertility issues. It was great to meet someone who also had MF, and it was a wonderful idea to have everyone support each other. I am truly happy to have "met" every one of the Braces Bunch.

    Congrats on one year!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I do, I do!! Especially now that we might be moving to IVF!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Happy Bday to the BB:) I have loved being a part of it even though I got started a little later in the year. I have kept every postcard and added it to my "memory of IF" box. I look fwd to getting the next generation added to us and I'm ready to start sending more snail mail! Thank you for starting the group. It has brought a smile to my face when words couldn't come.

    P.S. JEN, I also used to use a straightened paper clip to pretend I had braces...along with used those rubber colored bracelets--anyone remember those? My friends and I (ones without the real thing) would have a diff color every day and we'd chew on the half that was not on our teeth.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I do, I do! Sign me up! :) I love mail!

    ReplyDelete
  13. XXXX from me, and you're so right, I am to busy with me wee one, I sure miss you all though!

    congrats on coming up with such a fab idea and thanks a zillion times for the you know what (I'll post about it in my next round:)

    XXX

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thanks again for arranging this - I've loved being part of it and hope to be able to find a little time to continue even if not regularly.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Me Me Me! I HAD braces as a kid and felt on the outside...because I was the ONLY one that did. We deal with both male and female factor. Count in me!

    ReplyDelete
  16. hmm I think i have the reverse of you, your looking at all those girls with braces wishing you didn't have braces, I'm a girl with braces (not the one with the nice pretty plastic, i'm more like the full mouth metal ohhh sooo ugly braces variety). I have often looked at couples dealing with MF and were jealous because the woman was healthy(everyone told me it was very weird to be jealous of someone else's dx).
    Glad I'm not alone in my weirdness.

    Do you take Canucks in your group or is it Americans only? I'll send pretty stamps with queens and things on them.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hey JJ! I want in on the Braces Bunch thing! Love your post, congrats on 1 year!
    ~Hollie

    ReplyDelete
  18. bsYes. I want to be a buncher.

    ReplyDelete
  19. I'd love to join. I'll send my information.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Holy cow, a year already? That just flew by! Looking forward to another one!

    ReplyDelete
  21. I always meant to email you to see if I coudl join...but then would forget. So thanks for the invite to year 2! I'll be emailing you shortly

    ReplyDelete
  22. I'd like to be a buncher, if you'll have me! I'm also a male-factor gal, so I can relate to your feeling of being left out! No braces, and no normally shaped sperm! HAHA!

    Where do I send my information?

    ReplyDelete
  23. Or you can be someone who wasn't able to have children and is now living childfree post-infertility treatments but still dealing with, well, you know living infertile in a fertile world...

    Thanks, JJ!

    ReplyDelete
  24. it just never occurred to me that people with MFI would feel left out. i guess they must. i would join, but i couldn't do the group justice-i can barely keep up with posting as it is.
    but what a great idea!

    ReplyDelete
  25. I'm very happy to still be a part of this wonderful group. I'm not as active as I wanna be, but I'm in it and proud of it - thanks for arranging it and always keeping us on it.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I want in too! I will send you my address! Thanks

    ReplyDelete
  27. Hi JJ, I too am scarred for life for not having to have braces. I went to Catholic school and the nuns would yell at me if I tried to sneak into the bathroom with all my girlfriends after lunch when they had to brush their braced teeth...apparently non-bracers were banned from brushing or even spectating!

    I'd love you join your bunch btw!

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ok so I've heard of the braces bunch but never really knew what it was. I just saw this on I think we made a nugget and if it's not too late I would love to join.
    Ps, I wanted the braces so bad I finally got them at 19 (when it didn't matter any more) and they sucked.

    ReplyDelete
  29. What a fun idea! Any room for female factor's in the bunch???? How do I sign up?

    ReplyDelete

There is nothing like a good pair of jeans; they shape us, support us and make us look our best. I'd love for you to share your jeans with me!